How to Lead During A Crisis
By L’Oreal Thompson Payton, Guest Writer
L'Oreal Thompson Payton
A Baltimore-bred, Chicago-based freelance writer, public speaker, and occasional blogger covering the intersection of women, work, and wellness. Her work has been featured in Bustle, ZORA, and SELF, just to name a few. Learn more and subscribe to her weekly newsletter at LT in the City.
Being a leader is never easy. Being a leader during a global pandemic, however, requires a whole other level of empathy and emotional intelligence. What do you do when everyone is looking to you for answers and guidance? Although we’re conditioned to “keep it together” in times of crisis, leading with courageous vulnerability is a more mindful approach to caring for yourself and those around you.
To learn more about how to lead in a crisis, we talked to Emilie Aeries, author, podcast host, and the CEO and founder of Bossed Up, a personal and professional development community.
“The first mistake I see leaders making is being so focused on being a cheer squad that we invalidate people’s fears,” said Aeries. “You have to acknowledge the negative and validate fear, disappointment, mourning, and grief during this time of uncertainty. In the self-help world, I find we often make the mistake of finding the silver lining too much.”
Read on for more helpful tips to help you now and long after.
Put Your Oxygen Mask on First
While it’s easy to default to tending to others’ needs first, this is the time to prioritize your needs and put yourself at the top of your to-do list.
“Something I mention frequently in my book is the martyrdom mindset. It’s this uniquely American phenomenon that combines our nation’s history of Protestant work ethic with every gender norm of women taking care of everyone else first,” Aeries shared. “Right now, women leaders in particular are tempted to be the perfect wife, daughter, baker, quarantine birthday hostess, educator, and boss and it’s too much.”
Be sure to build in some self-care into your daily schedule, whether it’s a (socially-distanced) jog or walk around the block, 15-minute yoga class (there are a ton of free options on YouTube and Instagram Live right now), or a five-minute meditation on your favorite app (Insight Timer is my personal fave, also free!).
You show up as a better leader when you’ve filled your own cup first.
Lead with Empathy
Every industry has its jargon and there are phrases we find ourselves using simply to fill air. I mean, how many times can we really circle back, Jim? Now is not the time to sound like a corporate robot.
“Proactively create space for people to share how they’re doing emotionally, pscyhologically, and physiologically before getting down to business. We do a temperature check at the start of every team meeting to see how everyone’s doing,” Aeries explained. “And be sure to share transparently. It’s okay as a leader to say, ‘To be honest, I’m not firing on all cylinders today.’ Modeling authenticity gives others permission to do the same.”
Practicing active listening is also a great way to demonstrate empathy.
“When someone shares something really hard, it’s not your job to fix them -- it’s your job to listen,” said Aeries.
As author and shame researcher Brené Brown has said, “Empathy drives connection. Sympathy drives disconnection.” In short there are four elements of empathy: perspective taking; staying out of judgment; recognizing emotion in other people; and communicating and understanding that emotion.
Be Okay With Not Being Okay
Writer Markham Heid recently wrote for TIME magazine that “more than one in four American adults met the criteria that psychologists use to diagnose serious mental distress and illness. That represents a roughly 700% increase from pre-pandemic data collected in 2018.”
We’re all managing different stressors, ranging from depression and anxiety, concerns for our own health and wellbeing, as well as the lingering threat of unemployment.
“For a lot of leaders, we’re used to project managing our way through a problem,” said Aeries. “But you can’t problem-solve your way through a pandemic. This is not an ‘effort equals output’ type of situation. So the best thing we can do as leaders is connect with our teams on a human level. This is a challenging situation that is forcing us to sit with grief and uncertainty, we have to find a way to peacefully coexist with this collective grief.”
To learn more about crisis leadership, register for Emilie’s free online training.
Photo: Getty Images
