Saying Goodbye to Magical Thinking

by Tara Ebrahimi, Director of Communications

Last Wednesday, we woke up to the news that Georgia’s Senate run-off election had been called for the Democrats. Thanks to the hard work of the formidable Stacey Abrams one seat will be filled by a Black man and the other by a Jewish millennial. The win was more than historic, it signified a time to rebuild. It signified the possibility that Democrats could maybe, just maybe, fix some of the destruction of the past four years. It was a great start to the day, and what felt like a great start to 2021. 

Just a few hours later, it all went to shit.

The world watched in horror as a mob of violent white supremacist neo-Nazis overtook The Capitol, brandishing zip ties to take hostages, homemade napalm, confederate flags, and the many lies they’ve been told by a dangerous narcissist. Throughout the insurrection, a series of thoughts looped in my mind: This is the natural culmination of the past 4 years (but really, 400 years) → This can’t be a shock to anyone → I am somehow still shocked. 

This was Day 6 of the new year. And it was clear that a lot of the “hope” and “relief” around 2021 was actually magical thinking. Things don’t change because the clock strikes midnight on an arbitrary day or because you want them to so so SO bad. 

There is only one path to change, and that is through work. Hard fucking work. 

Many of us spent last year educating ourselves. We learned that white supremacy runs through every artery of this country. We learned how to be better allies. We learned how much it takes to transform wrongs into rights, to dismantle unjust systems, to address the root causes rather than the symptom of societal disease that have run amok in this country. 

But that’s not enough. At Women Unite! we believe in action. Yes, learning and personal growth are important. The events of January 6th, among other things, are a reminder of what happens when people fail to use critical thinking and just blindly believe lies, bombast, and the cult of personality. We believe it’s critical to take learning beyond the act of individual self-improvement, because when we harness that learning, it has the power to become action, and action has the power to make real change. 

If 2020 was a year of learning, 2021 must be a year of doing. Forget the empty gestures of virtue signaling, forget the empty “I’m listening” bullshit, who cares about the one or two books you read by Black writers. All of that is useless unless you’re willing to get on the bus (thank you, Spike Lee).

Frederick Douglass said, “If there is no struggle, there is no progress.” The struggle is definitely real. We know you’re tired. We know that at times it feels hopeless, pointless, or just too insurmountable. We know because we feel all of these things too. But we can make progress--we must make progress--even if it’s incremental. The work doesn’t have to be earth-shattering; do whatever you can each day. Just be sure it holds meaning and has value. 

What are some ways you can do the work, each and every day? 

Start with yourself. Connect with groups or organizations who are making change, and see how you can contribute to and amplify their work through consistent volunteering, monthly donations, and sharing their impactful messages. Contact local policymakers or government representatives to determine where you can focus your efforts. Use your voice, your resources, and your privilege.

Then move out from yourself into your sphere of influence. Do an audit of your networks, and find the people who have shown an openness to engaging in discussion and being educated, those who can be moved in the right direction. Have tough conversations with these people, which might mean prioritizing the needs and issues of those most marginalized over your own personal comfort. And for the people in your circle whose words and action harm others, and who demonstrate a consistent refusal to change, set consequences--even if that includes cutting someone out of your life.

Through the transformative results in Georgia last week, we saw what happens when people organize around a shared goal. But the reality is that this was the big success after years of small wins and big (and small) losses. It was the result of countless individuals who worked together. Change happens when we commit as a collective, take small steps and big ones, day in and day out. That’s where the work is. And the work is where we need to be.

So join us. Bring friends. No RSVP required. We cordially invite you to get shit done in 2021.

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A Spectrum of Grief